We are constantly being reborn. But some experiences turn us inside out. The birth of my second child was like that. All of a sudden I was so genuine I couldn’t recognize myself. I stayed in my essence only for several days because I had no clue how to integrate it into my daily life. So I abondoned it. But there is tremendous longing to go back to that state of being, to the feeling of authentic power, joy, love.
I was profoundly transformed by the births of both of my children. Childbirth changes women into mothers. I was overwhelmed by the tremendous development I have gone through inside myself before I would get to my orgasmic birth experience. I was thorn apart by the reality of my vivid sexual pleasurable experience compared to what I heard from other women. It was heartbreaking to know how they and their children suffer. In a way, I felt obliged to share my possitive birth experience and spread the word, that birth itself doesn’t have to be as negative as we are told in my culture.
I wrote my orgasmic birth story and received feedbeck which made me think. Weren’t I affraid to have myself a freebirth? I was nothing but afraid! But not during the birth itself. Maybe, I need to tell the story of how I came to have kids, I thought. The book was written a year after my second birth. At first I thought it would be just a means of my therapy. Eventually I happened to publish it almost exactly in the same words. It’s very open and tuches upon several taboos. The amount of shame and guilt I experienced when my family members, friends, teachers and strangers read it is hard to explain. But that’s on of the strongest features of this book. It’s real. It’s raw. It’s true.
I’m writing this text and my son will have six years in couple of hours. I wish I could feel it again. We have both benefited from his joyful coming to this world. I might not have other child, but may be you or someone you know would. My wish is that they get to read my book before they do.
As I’m writing this text, my son will be six years old in a couple of hours. I wish I could feel the birth experience all again. We have both benefited from his joyful coming into this world. I might not have another child, but maybe you or someone you know will. My wish is that they get to read my book before they do.
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